2022 saw the year where I started realizing how easy it is to fall in the trap of the world and “Oh look shiny thing” let’s buy the shiny thing. Maybe you don’t but me and my goblin (adhd) brain do. This is a long up hill battle for me the grab happy goblin. I got lost a few times, fell back a couple more. Which means I bought more crap I didn’t need and in reality other then a quick dopamine hit; I didn’t really want. Was all of it ultimately useless no, none of it was life changing; some was useful. Not a 100% loss and waste but reality hitting me over the head of how being overwhelmed in a house full of stuff. Stuff that no one other then me wants; if something were to happen to me would be a burden to my family and friends to take care of (save it, I am fine. I am a realist that nobody is gonna want my stuff and it is a lot of stuff to burden someone with. I never want to be a burden.) is always hanging over my shoulder. The what if’s of where we could be if I could I didn’t struggle with this; I would dance around the term shopping addict. I know this is not seen as an addiction but let me tell you it is just one of many socially acceptable addictions; that if we all looked too close we would get a harsh reality none of us want.
I didn’t want to see it and admit; now what am I going to do help myself break this cycle of addiction. When shopping isn’t something that you can cold turkey quit. I have talked about this before; I know what makes now different? What makes the time that it finally clicks different we never know, I don’t blame you if you don’t believe me. Sometimes it is hard to make myself believe in myself that I can change. I know I am possible of change; me being here writing this here in the year 2023 is because of change. I know in reality that the small changes is what in total will make the big change possible. I have been thinking about this heavily all last week. How do I want make changes?
- Take a picture (add it to a wishlist) and walk away from things I want to purchase (Review the list once every 30 days. Removing things that were dopamine chasers, wait another 30 days or until savings goal met to purchase any remaining.
- No buying t-shirts (outside of a Metallica concert tee in August at the show)
- No Shoes (Outside of maybe new work shoes and a pair of freebird boots that i am saving for)
- If there is something I want save and buy the actual item instead of trying to dupe and spending more trying to find the “right” dupe.
- No make up or hair care unless replacing something
- No fragrance (make a list if I use it and up and want to replace it when I have used up most of my excessive perfume collecetion)
- If I do replace something let go of the thing that is being replaced (there is no need to hold onto the old)
- Keep editing my wardrobe/style to only contain items I love.
- It is okay to not have the same style as everyone else; I am myself and I am enough.
- No home decor (outside of a drum lampshade for my vintage lamp.
Ultimately this is the year of less; letting things go, bringing less in. I want to end up living more with less stuff and more connection with myself.
Awkward Club 